Category Archives: Movie Review

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Movie Review – The Social Network

Category : Movie Review

Director: David Fincher

Starring: Jesse Eisenberg, Andrew Garfield, Armie Hammer

Year: 2010

The combination of director David Fincher (Alien 3, Seven, The Game, Fight Club, Panic Room, Zodiac, Benjamin Button, Gone Girl), writer Aaron Sorkin (A Few Good Men, Malice, The American President, Sports Night, West Wing, Charlie Wilson’s War, Moneyball, Steve Jobs, Molly’s Game), and star Jesse Eisenberg (The Squid and the Whale, Adventure Land, Zombieland, To Rome with Love, Now You See Me, The Double, The End of the Tour, Dawn of Justice, Cafe Society, The Art of Self-Defense) is something to see by itself, regardless of content (and the content here happens to be spectacular).  Just looking at those filmographies is overwhelming, to see what great works these artists have produced, Social Network being just another to add to their lists, and perhaps to the very top.  It’s a stunning all-around achievement, a wickedly entertaining true story, and only gets more relevant with the passing of time.  And to think that I didn’t really get the hype the first time I saw it; count me corrected.

Being the little man on campus wasn’t sitting well with Harvard student Mark Zuckerberg, so he decided to do something about it.  He wasn’t getting into the best clubs, his family didn’t have the most money, his girlfriend had just dumped him; why not take his anger out on the system (and on women) by creating a website that allowed you to compare co-eds and rate them based on looks?  It might be rude, sexist even, a little sleazy, but Mark had the brains to create whatever he wanted, and the bile to force the issue.  His website would crash Harvard’s network and get the attention of the wealthy Winklevoss twins, who wanted Zuck to help them craft an exclusive social site for Harvard students that would allow them to create profiles, post updates, share pictures, connect on a whole new level.  With this idea in tow, and completely ignoring that he stole it from someone else, Mark Zuckerberg and his best friend Eduardo Saverin created Facebook, and the rest, as they say, is history.

David Fincher hasn’t made a good movie in 10 years, Aaron Sorkin either really, and I’ll never be able to shake watching Jesse Eisenberg’s first ever movie, a real made-for-TV conversation piece called Lighting: Fire from the Sky, but, holy cow, Social Network is phenomenal.  It is the perfect combination of talented people and fascinating content, spilled into our laps regardless of ick factor, like, here you go, you asked for reality, and here it is, though you might not like what you see.  The true story of an empire created by a robot gone mad wasn’t ever going to be very palatable, but wow is it watchable, to see a possible sociopath carve through boundaries and remake the world because he also happens to be a legitimate genius.  Eiesenberg plays Zuckerberg to perfection, Garfield is an astounding railroaded friend, and Armie Hammer as The Winklevi completely steals the show; I’m 6’5, 220, and there are two of me.  The rest of the cast is a name drop that actually works: Rooney Mara, Justin Timberlake, Rashida Jones, Max Minghella, and Dakota Johnson with a butt shot that might have jump started her career (ignoring the famous parents).  The film is smart, quick, dark, disturbing, oddly funny, boasts great music, and flows perfectly; it’s a masterclass in storytelling and detail-oriented filmmaking.  Some say this is the best of the decade, but I don’t even think it’s Fincher’s strongest; still, it’s hard to argue having just watched it and having just been blown away.

My rating: ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆

 

 


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Movie Review – Alpha Dog

Category : Movie Review

Director: Nick Cassavetes

Starring: Justin Timberlake, Anton Yelchin, Emile Hirsch

Year: 2006

When the who’s who element of your film becomes the focal point and the plot splinters into a thousand pieces in the background, you know you’ve made a mistake delivering your message, and your movie has just become a missed opportunity.  Alpha Dog has a great concept, nice cast, is a cool experiment, uses a gutsy style, but then fails to come together as one solid product, and so the fact that there are a million celebrities in every scene becomes the only reason to watch, and that’s just not good.  I wanted to be a fan, since I missed it when it came out over a dozen years ago, but I simply couldn’t; there were too many obvious pieces going wrong, the scales tipped, and anything solid that could potentially have been build fell apart before it really had a chance.

Johnny Truelove runs a small gang of goofy drug dealers who worship him as a god, at least as long as he provides the drugs, the money, the girls, and that rock&roll lifestyle.  He’s young and kinda bratty, but people do what he says, and they all get to smoke weed and bang chicks, so no one’s complaining.  Except Jake Mazursky, who has a deal turn sour and then gets railed on by Johnny, who thinks he’s being mouthy.  Jake begins to terrorize Johnny, like stupid children in a schoolyard, expect these kids have guns.  The result; Johnny kidnaps Jake’s little brother Zach when the opportunity presents itself, because he wants a little damned respect and attention!  Well, he’s got Jake’s attention now, and a war between gangs is about to break out; California Dreamin’ not so much.  So Johnny gets his pal Frankie to babysitter the comfortably kidnapped Zach, but the pair become friends somehow, further complicating a situation that slid irreparably sideways a long time ago.

Nick Cassavetes is a bad director, which may have been the only real reason that Alpha Dog bombs when you ignore the star power and the shock value.  John Q, The Notebook, My Sister’s Keeper, The Other Woman; ouch those are some bad flicks, basically embarrassingly terrible.  Alpha Dog, though different, isn’t really much better when you watch it with a wary eye, mostly because the direction is absolutely awful, with scenes and moments and edits and plots that go nowhere, do nothing, and make so sense.  Cassavetes created something really REALLY messy, a drama that is all over the place, and never stays still long enough for us to really watch, which, you know, might have been a ploy since maybe the meat of the movie wasn’t great either.  The actors are mostly great, or would be some day, I just don’t think any of them really worked like they were supposed to: Timberlake, Yelchin, Hirsch, Ben Foster, Bruce Willis, Sharon Stone, Harry Dean Stanton, Olivia Wilde, Amanda Seyfried, Amber Heard, Alan Thicke.  Timberlake wasn’t even an actor yet, this was his first real role, he’d follow it up with a lot better with Black Snake Moan, but it’d be a while until he really figured out what he was doing: The Social Network, Inside Llewyn Davis, Trolls.  Anton Yelchin I will always love, Ben Foster is a god, but everyone else kinda sucked, and so did the movie in general; it was forced and frantic, which is a not a strong combination.

My rating: ☆ ☆

 

 


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Movie Review – But I’m a Cheerleader

Category : Movie Review

Director: Jamie Babbit

Starring: Natasha Lyonne, Clea DuVall, Cathy Moriarty

Year: 1999

Jamie Babbit directed several episodes of Undressed in 1999 as well, for which I will always be grateful; that show really meant something to me when I was 16 and curious.  It was a boundary-pushing show, a counter-culture gem, a literal guilty pleasure, and was pretty educational, if not exactly the kind my parents would have wanted me getting.  Much of the same can be said about But I’m a Cheerleader; it was in some ways very ahead of its time.  This was my first time watching it however, and I couldn’t help cringe at the flaws, of which there were many, but I think I was also able to watch it as it would have been watched at the turn of the millennium, and, from that view point, things weren’t all bad.

Megan can’t be a lesbian; she’s a cheerleader!  She comes from a religious family, she’s super popular, she has a boyfriend; so what if she doesn’t really like kissing him and would rather imagine the other cheerleaders bouncing around, that’s normal, right?  Well, her family holds an intervention and they convince her to attend a conversion camp, where she does finally realize that she is indeed a homo.  But is that a bad thing?  The camp director sure thinks it is, and so do Megan’s parents, and so even do most of the other kids; they seem to want to change themselves into something better, more normal, more accepted.  All except Graham, a girl who isn’t afraid to be herself, and who might be Megan’s first love.

I’m not sure how that summary came off, but I want to make something clear; this film supports gay youth and denounces conversion, it just comes at it from a very campy direction, in the most literal sense.  It’s like over-dramatic horror of a different kind, the kind where your parents try to make you want to die simply for being yourself.  It’s horrible but it’s real, and this film makes it palatable by crafting it into a joke, while poking fun of all the assholes who really deserve it.  So bravo for that, that’s a pretty progressive message for the late 90s, and it was done almost in a Cry-Baby way, so colorful & crazy, which is weird but kinda works.  Babbit is more a TV director, so the whole thing feels messy and episodic, but her cast works fairly well, and is littered with names & faces: Lyonne, DuVall, Michelle Williams, RuPaul, Melanie Lynskey, Kip Pardue, Julie Delpy, Dante Basco (Rufio).  This is definitely a movie to watch once to have the experience, although it can’t be called well-constructed; the message is the point, not the delivery, if you can accept that and forgive the rest.

My rating: ☆ ☆ ☆

 

 


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Movie Review – The Platform

Category : Movie Review

Director: Galder Gaztelu-Urrutia

Starring: Ivan Massague, Zorion Eguileor, Alexandra Masangkay

Year: 2019

While we’re all in quarantine, some of the best movies of the year are going to be streamed, and the first I will add to that list is The Platform.  This Spanish sci-fi/horror/thriller from Netflix is the second best film I’ve seen this year so far, behind only Onward, and I think it has a chance to stay near the top even after cinemas get back in full swing, when standard releases & Oscar contenders dominate the conversation once more.  What makes The Platform work is its patience, its honest message, and its refusal to sell itself cheap; it takes a toll from audiences, that’s the price we pay for our enjoyment, and I’d willingly reach into my pocket again, because it’s worth it.

You can go into The Hole voluntarily, you can choose it over standard prison, you can sign up for a reward at the end, but you have no real idea what kind of hell you are throwing yourself into; even if you survive your time, you won’t exit completely human.  The Hole is torture of a rare kind, destroying your mind as well as you body, but the process is fairly simple.  Each level of the vertical structure, and there are hundreds, holds two people.  In the center of the cell is a square opening though which, from above, a platform descends.  On this platform is enough food for every single occupant, at least if the people at the top take only a small share.  But greed doesn’t leave us when we are reduced to our basest selves, it can become the only thing that drives us, that and the desire to survive.  Every month you are transferred to a different level; will you find yourself lucky and near the top, free to eat whatever delicious food you choose, or near the bottom, where living might mean becoming a monster.

Not only is The Platform an incredible horror film, a unique sci-fi experience, and a modern thrill-ride, but it’s also director Galder Gaztelu-Urrutia’s debut, which might be the most shocking thing about the film; it feels like a masterwork.  It’s creepy, it’s startling, it’s disgusting, it’s bloody, it’s primal; all the things you would ask for from a twisted tale trying to push the envelope.  At the same time, the message is amazing, the sociological perspective clear, and you feel for these trapped animals when you begin to understand that’s simply what we all are.  Ivan Massague was in Pan’s Labyrinth, and you can definitely feel a dark Guillermo del Toro mood throughout, combined with the mesmerizing quality of something much cheaper, like Cube.  On Netflix now, this can’t be called a movie for the masses, but it is definitely one that the more discerning shouldn’t let pass by, especially while they have time on their hands.

My rating: ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆

 


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Movie Review – Rocky V

Category : Movie Review

Director: John G. Avildsen

Starring: Sylvester Stallone, Sage Stallone, Tommy Morrison

Year: 1990

Rocky V is a travesty, a sham, and a mockery; it’s a traveshamockery!  It’s especially bad when you remember (or have just watched) how good the first was 14 years previous, and even how great the fourth one worked 5 years before.  This formula can work and has worked; it’s ridiculous that adding the original director back into the fold wasn’t enough to pick this story back up again, given how much we already are ready to love it.  Simply put, this Rocky is a stupid disaster from start to finish, and anyone involved in it should be ashamed.  Maybe it was a bad idea to cast your son as your son and some random real boxer as the emotional lead of the film.  Bleck.

When Rocky returns from his match with Ivan Drago, he finds that a lot has changed.  Sure, he’s an international sensation and a local hero, but Paulie has lost all the family’s money somehow, so it’s back to rags from riches.  Seriously; they move back to their old neighborhood, Rocky starts working at Mickey’s gym, Adrian starts back at the pet shop, Rock Jr. has to go to the rundown school, and everything looks to have turned back gray; nothing gold can say.  But there might be a silver lining; a kid named Tommy Gunn wants Rocky to be his manager, and just might have the talent to make it big.  Ignoring his own family, Rocky takes someone else under his wing, jeopardizing all he’s worked so hard to build over all these years.

Rocky, Rocky II, Rocky III, Rocky IV, and now Rocky V; there’s still Rocky Balboa, but that was done 16 years later; it might as well be considered in a group with Creed and Creed II.  So there you have the quintuplogy (?) and man oh man did they end it on a low note.  This latest episode in the Balboa saga is a steaming pile, nothing more than that, and it’s a shame it had to come to this.  The dialogue is ridiculous, Sly’s son is abysmal and a huge pivotal part, Tommy is even worse and he’s like the main character, and then there’s a forced angel-on-my-shoulder plot line that feels completely out of place and idiotic.  All the old ingredients are missing, as much as they tried to force feed what was supposed to taste similarly but never, ever could.  The fight at the end makes you feel less intelligent having watched it, and that’s not the way I wanted to close this chapter of my life, watching these five films.  Oh well, I had some fun along the way, it definitely wasn’t all bad, even the best artists have trouble tying a bow on even the best content.

My rating: ☆

 

 


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Movie Review – Rocky IV

Category : Movie Review

Director: Sylvester Stallone

Starring: Sylvester Stallone, Brigitte Nielson, Dolph Lundgren

Year: 1985

It’s time to go full 80s with a movie about evil Russians, because we’re Americans and that’s what we want to do!  The idea of Americans vs Soviets was part of pop culture so strong that even Rocky fought the evil Reds, and honestly that’s the smartest thing Stallone did, injecting that sort that formula into the veins of his franchise.  Not condoning the hate, just stating the obvious; we loved to root for the good ol’ U.S. of A, we loved Rocky, the combination of the two was genius.  This is basically the end of an era, although multiple films would follow; this is where the series that started so well ends on a high note.

Although both are retired from boxing, Balboa & Creed remain fierce competitors and good friends.  When Russian amateur fighter Ivan Drago challenges the best America has to offer to fight him for the pride of their country, Apollo steps up to participate in the exhibition match, ready to defend his honor and put on a show.  But the match ends in tragedy, because Drago wasn’t there to perform, he was there to destroy.  In an unsanctioned bout, Rocky will fly to Russia to train for the fight of his life and to defeat the monster who took down his friend.  What happens in the ring might not just change two men, but two nations as well.

This is what I’m talking about.  It’s not Rocky, with that killer vibe, it’s not Rocky II, with the music & the heart & Mickey, it’s not Rocky III, with the cheese, it’s a Rocky movie for a whole new audience, and it knows what it’s doing, knows where its hooks are going in deep.  Death, revenge, back to the basics, passion, honor, the refusal to ever give up; these things are at the heart of the franchise, and they’re on display very broadly here.  Drago is such a great villain, as is his entire team, and we really want Balboa to take him down, it becomes very important to us very quickly.  Some iconic scenes, iconic lines, memorable feelings, and wonderful cinematic moments, Rocky IV is where it’s at and will always be a champion in its own league.

My rating: ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆

 

 


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Movie Review – Rocky III

Category : Movie Review

Director: Sylvester Stallone

Starring: Sylvester Stallone, Carl Weathers, Mr. T

Year: 1982

The third installment of the Rocky franchise might have added Eye of the Tiger, but it also added dialogue, and that’s not as great.  There’s a conversation on the beach between Rock and Adrian that’s so cringe-worthy it’s legendary, not to mention the running & jumping & hugging on the beach that’s equally weird; maybe the Balboas should have simply stayed in Philly.  That’s the thing; Rocky III does a few things differently and some of them work, but most are just silly, making it the weakest film in the franchise so far (and the worst overall until #5).  Still, it’s a stepping stone forward in the overall narrative and so necessary, we just can’t really get excited because of all the little things that go majorly wrong.

Rocky lost to Apollo (Rocky), beat Apollo (Rocky II), became the Champ, defended his title ten times, and is ready to call it quits.  He’s got money now, a family, a statue, everything is going well, so why is still being pulled toward the ring?  An exhibition match for charity with a wrestler gains the attention of a fighter named Clubber Lang, who wants a piece of a champ he sees as more of a chump, a fool to be pitied.  So Rocky comes out of retirement to defend his honor, only to lose to Lang, and to lose a dear friend in the process.  His spirit broken, Balboa must regain the eye of the tiger, that fighting instinct that drives the very best, and who better to teach him to harness that power than his old rival, Apollo Creed.

There are plenty of additions that make Rocky III fun, even while it gets exponentially goofier.  First, we get three fights, not just one; Thunderlips, Lang 1, and Lang 2.  That’s a big difference from the others, and it’s welcome to audiences wanting more of the sport, more of the competition, more of the heart behind the strategy.  Also, we get more Apollo, and Apollo as a friend too, which is cool, and this film is the one that really sets up Creed to come out in the future.  Rocky goes back to the basics, finds his inner champion, and that’s all we really want to see, so there you go.  But man are there some cheesy moments, especially since neither Hulk Hogan nor Mr. T can act.  The running scenes on the beach are iconic, but they’re also ridiculous, so bear with them as the music plays and try to have a good time anyway.  That’s good advice for the entire experience; enjoy despite the problems, and get ready for a return to greatness with Rocky IV.

My rating: ☆ ☆ ☆

 

 


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Movie Review – Rocky II

Category : Movie Review

Director: Sylvester Stallone

Starring: Sylvester Stallone, Talia Shire, Carl Weathers

Year: 1979

Rocky is the king; Rocky II is the heir to the throne that can’t possibly live up to his dad.  That metaphor works even better when you consider that Rocky has a kid in the sequel, which is one of the strangest parts of the film, so there you go.  But Rocky II does a lot of little, important things right along the way to a predictable conclusion as well, so it can’t be completely discounted, it just can’t be held up quite as high as its pater familias.  Basically we’re back for another round, and that can’t be all bad, since the first trip circling the block was so enjoyable.  Rocky is a legendary character, we (almost) just can’t get enough, so wade in and enjoy some more of the Italian Stallion, while he’s still in his prime.

Balboa has lost to Creed, but winning wasn’t really the point; he stood toe to toe with the champ and never gave up or stayed down, forcing the judges to make the call, and proving to the world that an underdog can pack a real punch.  Well, Apollo doesn’t like winning that way, so he’s pushing for a rematch, though Rocky says he’s retired.  Adrian doesn’t want him to fight again, and there’s a baby on the way, so it’s a no-go.  Mickey wants to train Rock anyway, the comeback put on hold when Adrian has complications with the baby.  But when everything turns out OK, Rocky turns his attention to Creed, and begins planning his strategy, a bout that will make him a legend.

Rocky II makes some key improvements over Rocky I, which is important, because a lot of the rest of it is no good.  I mean, this time Stallone wanted to direct, which obviously isn’t his strong suit.  Adrian’s coma, the dialogue, a runtime that couldn’t be completely filled; there were mistakes made, and there was no way this one was gonna live up to the first, especially ditching the use of that laid back 70s flick vibe that worked so well before.  But that’s not to say that Stallone didn’t know what audiences wanted.  More Mickey, more music, a longer, more detailed fight at the end; audiences were happy with the treats they were thrown.  It was almost enough to make us forgive the flaws (almost), and more than enough to make us enjoy Rocky and his success story one more time around.

My rating: ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆

 

 


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Movie Review – Rocky

Category : Movie Review

Director: John G. Avildsen

Starring: Sylvester Stallone, Talia Shire, Carl Weathers

Year: 1976

Rocky is the perfect storm of mediocre talent peaking at the right/same moment and giving us something magical that could never be reproduced.  They tried, like five more times, but none of the other films in the franchise were ever quite as good as the original; Rocky remains champion.  The fact that Sylvester Stallone wrote the screenplay, wrote himself a part, and somehow got it all to work (it was nominated for 10 Oscars) will never not be anything short of a miracle, but then again that’s the whole point; sometimes miracles happen.  This film is simply that specific concept come to life, a larger-than-life story that shouldn’t win but does, a 70s gem that, luckily for us, shone very brightly for one brief moment in time, but etched itself on our minds so sharply that we’ll never forget.

Rocky Balboa is a bum of a boxer who never made it big whose side job is breaking people’s thumbs for a local Philly bookie.  That’s not Rocky though, he’s sweet, he’s kind, he may not be the brightest crayon in the box but he’s got a heart of gold.  He loves his turtles, his neighborhood, working out at Mickey’s gym, and the shy girl at the corner pet store, the mousy little Adrian.  But his chance to make a name for himself isn’t as far off as he imagines, because lighting is about to strike.  The Champion of the World, Apollo Creed, wants an unknown for his next opponent, a chance to gain a massive audience to watch a David & Goliath story, and he picks Rocky, the so-called Italian Stallion.  They seem to be in different classes as competitors, but Balboa has a heart that won’t quit, a tenacious southpaw style that’s hard to beat, and an entire city behind him willing him to win.

It’s gold, that’s all I can say.  Well no, that’s not true, I’m gonna say more, but that’s really what it boils down to; Rocky is gold.  It’s a sports movie with that feel-good, underdog mentality like so many others we’ve seen, but perhaps never done so well as this; Rocky is the leader of the pack.  We root for him like we’ve never rooted for anyone before, and we’re with him every step of the way, through his self doubts and his greatest achievements.  The music is spectacular, obviously, and sweeps us along, pulling all the right strings at all the right moments.  But, surprisingly, the writing is very good, done in a wonderfully simple 70s style that’s among my personal favorites, I just love the unaffected flow of 70s movies with their honest expressions and bare bones.  Rocky isn’t complicated, his mission is focused, his heart is in the right place, we fall in love with him, and so also with the film, partly because it’s so believable and uncluttered.  All the pieces combine around the actors, who all give shockingly great performances: Stallone, Shire, Weathers, Burt Young as Paulie, Burgess Meredith as Mickey.  It’s just good timing, amazing timing, perfect timing, and we don’t see films like this very often where all the elements combine at the right moment in the right way; Rocky is special.

My rating: ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆

 

 


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Movie Review – Greed

Category : Movie Review

Director: Michael Winterbottom

Starring: Steve Coogan, David Mitchell, Isla Fisher

Year: 2019

Michael Winterbottom likes to work with Steve Coogan, which is great, but unfortunately Greed is more The Look of Love than The Trip franchise, except also much, much worse.  Winterbottom isn’t afraid to experiment, which is great, but sometimes those experiments blow up in his face, and that’s exactly what we have here, a good idea in theory that simply explodes in vomitous style all over everyone involved.  It’s lucky that this movie wasn’t released very widely or seen by almost anyone, because it is bad enough to mar otherwise positive career paths and give audiences a bad taste in their collective mouths that could last into next season or beyond.  Simply put, Greed is boring, banal, and in bad taste, an overall failure from every angle that will make any lover of film cautious the next time they go to snuggle up.

It’s Sir Richard “Greedy” McCreadie’s 60th birthday, and that can only mean one thing; moronic extravagance.  The bazillionaire is known for his wild romps, where no expense is spared, and you never know which celebrity you’ll find around any given corner, but his success didn’t start out easy, he had to fight for every dollar her earned, which just fueled his desire to win no matter what, fleece whoever he can, and cash in whatever chips he has in the game before anyone can notice that there’s a crooked asshole in their midst.  Richard started his empire by buying cheap clothes, selling them for an amazing amount more than they are worth, and paying his workers nothing; now he’s the richest man in Britain, go figure.  But these evil ways will catch up with him someday; divorce, screwed up children, no friends, tax investigations, public humiliation.  Money can’t buy happiness, Sir Greedy; you’d think 60 years would be long enough to figure that out.

So I’ve enjoyed Winterbottom before, like I said he takes risks and that’s great, but my god did Greed turn into a swing & a miss fast enough to make your head spin.  Steve Coogan is the man, he’s great, but there was nothing he could do to carry this dead dog to the finish line, all he could come up with was to be as over the top as possible and hope it worked out in the end.  It did not, that’s for sure, but hey, at least they tried.  That’s the positive way to look at it; the negative way is to call this film what it obviously is; one of the worst of the entire year and one that’s bad enough to hold that position.  There were eight thousand boring storylines all wrapped up in one bad experience, and I just wished each of them would end as they were happening: the garment district, sweat shops, tax evasion, ego trips, divorces, patricide, reality TV, celebrity status, Syrian refugees.  It was all way too much, no focus was given to any one thing, and the entire movie felt like it was puked out instead of captured on film.  It was sleepy, stupid, recycled, and not funny in the least; don’t be fooled by the word ‘satire’.  David Mitchell I liked quite a bit, but I was a fan of That Mitchell and Webb Look, so that was a given, and even he couldn’t work hard enough to make anything happening around him a success.  This wasn’t really an exposé on the super-rich, it was a clunky attempt to make 100 statements at the same time, and so they all failed miserably while almost the entire cast embarrassed themselves.  Stay far, far away from this one, which shouldn’t be hard, and try to forget these talented people made something this awful.

My rating: ☆ ☆